Hell is Other People
Redressing nutritional deficiencies, killing infection and all the other biological stuff is relatively easy. The hard part of getting better is dodging the social crap because "Hell is other people."
I tried hard to keep things on the down low and not talk in person about my efforts to get well when in social settings and to handle things as privately as possible. I do talk about it online but I also am careful about when, where and how I do that and have gotten plenty of flak for it over the years anyway.
Talking about it online gives me more room to choose my words and decide how to talk about it. It's really hard to do that face-to-face, especially since I have serious health problems and sometimes I'm not up to thinking fast on my feet.
I was mostly able to take supplements or do alternative treatment stuff in private (at home, in a public bathroom while alone, etc) and eat in private (alone or with friends/family who are in on your cockamamie scheme to take care of your own health). The exception was when I had a corporate job I sometimes had to eat with my team for team events and that was challenging.
My policy was roughly:
I absolutely did not want to say anything like "Well, gotta watch my weight and the food here is always so fattening." Long experience tells me that saying anything that could possibly be miscontrued as calling someone else "fat" and accusing them of not trying hard enough to watch their weight is highly likely to result in some kind of craziness that just follows me around for ages that they will not want to let go of.
Most people are amazingly talented at wildly misinterpreting everything and anything as somehow about them. So I tried hard to not make any generalized statements that could in any way be construed as being commentary on anyone but ME and MY relationship to food.
I talked about ME. I did my best to be 100 percent truthful and factual while saying as little as possible about my life and health.
I tried to avoid naming my diagnosis because people hear "cystic fibrosis" and interpret that to mean "She's DYING!!!" Instead, I tried to give a general description like respiratory problems or blood sugar issues or allergies that was pertinent to what I was trying to communicate while minimizing freak-outs and lurid interest by people I barely knew and didn't wish to discuss my medical situation with.
Even if this particular person already knew my diagnosis, I tried to avoid repeating it. They may have forgotten it already and repeating it also unnecessarily informs others within earshot of information that is none of their business. Unfortunately, people are just amazingly bad about thinking if they know my diagnosis, they are entitled to butt into my life.
I also learned to just not engage. I would stare without answering or get up and walk away or otherwise disengage.
Getting into a back and forth with someone doesn't generally make them butt out. It generally makes them feel entitled to interfere and convinces them I am obligated to justify my life choices to them.
I'm not, so I generally don't. It doesn't go good places socially to de facto "agree" with such bullshit.
I tried hard to keep things on the down low and not talk in person about my efforts to get well when in social settings and to handle things as privately as possible. I do talk about it online but I also am careful about when, where and how I do that and have gotten plenty of flak for it over the years anyway.
Talking about it online gives me more room to choose my words and decide how to talk about it. It's really hard to do that face-to-face, especially since I have serious health problems and sometimes I'm not up to thinking fast on my feet.
I was mostly able to take supplements or do alternative treatment stuff in private (at home, in a public bathroom while alone, etc) and eat in private (alone or with friends/family who are in on your cockamamie scheme to take care of your own health). The exception was when I had a corporate job I sometimes had to eat with my team for team events and that was challenging.
My policy was roughly:
- Give a brief, minimal but true explanation about my weird behavior.
- Make sure it in no way implies anything about anyone else.
- Change the subject as quickly as possible.
I absolutely did not want to say anything like "Well, gotta watch my weight and the food here is always so fattening." Long experience tells me that saying anything that could possibly be miscontrued as calling someone else "fat" and accusing them of not trying hard enough to watch their weight is highly likely to result in some kind of craziness that just follows me around for ages that they will not want to let go of.
Most people are amazingly talented at wildly misinterpreting everything and anything as somehow about them. So I tried hard to not make any generalized statements that could in any way be construed as being commentary on anyone but ME and MY relationship to food.
I talked about ME. I did my best to be 100 percent truthful and factual while saying as little as possible about my life and health.
I tried to avoid naming my diagnosis because people hear "cystic fibrosis" and interpret that to mean "She's DYING!!!" Instead, I tried to give a general description like respiratory problems or blood sugar issues or allergies that was pertinent to what I was trying to communicate while minimizing freak-outs and lurid interest by people I barely knew and didn't wish to discuss my medical situation with.
Even if this particular person already knew my diagnosis, I tried to avoid repeating it. They may have forgotten it already and repeating it also unnecessarily informs others within earshot of information that is none of their business. Unfortunately, people are just amazingly bad about thinking if they know my diagnosis, they are entitled to butt into my life.
I also learned to just not engage. I would stare without answering or get up and walk away or otherwise disengage.
Getting into a back and forth with someone doesn't generally make them butt out. It generally makes them feel entitled to interfere and convinces them I am obligated to justify my life choices to them.
I'm not, so I generally don't. It doesn't go good places socially to de facto "agree" with such bullshit.
