Doctor Who?

Thus began a policy of getting rid of everything periodically for several years, living a fairly spartan life overall plus finding ways to break the cycle when getting rid of something old and replacing it with something new. So that was a major turning point in how to escape my past -- my pattern of health issues and my broken mental models that they were rooted in.

My sons got new ID cards recently. One of them had no ID and the other one had an ID that was several years old and came up to Washington state with us from California.

I believe it was the last thing in our home that was from when we were homeless and very ill. Getting rid of that tiny piece of plastic has hit us all hard and makes me think of this Doctor Who scene.

Doctor Who, Father's Day

"I'm the oldest thing in here."

It's a time travel show. Doctor Who's sidekick, Rose, has gone back in time to see her father who died while she was a baby and she has saved her father's life, creating a paradox and Reapers show up to fix the mess. Rose's father ultimately chooses to die at his appointed time and place in order to set things right.

Recent events make me think of that scene because that tiny piece of plastic was the oldest thing in here. Getting rid of it means getting rid of something from an era when we were all a lot sicker and so forth.

It's a clear pattern in our lives but it probably would sound fantastical to others.

I slept like an hour and a half yesterday, likely part of the fallout from the card going some days ago, and then from about 10pm last night to 4pm today I slept more than not. I don't know the total hours I slept, maybe twelve or fourteen hours broken up.

I'm not fully recovered, but I'm certainly less of a spaz than yesterday and this extreme insomnia followed by sleeping a LOT to recover from it is sort of par for the course for such events.

My belly bloat has resumed shrinking further, a process started by us moving some months back. There will likely be several weeks of fallout from tossing this tiny piece of plastic known as a California state ID card.

But this is significant forward progress and it closes the door on some old problems that shouldn't come back.

I don't have any old photos that aren't digital or old mementos or whatever. I spent some years repeatedly getting rid of everything and living with very little, in part because I was so sick that I was a primary source of illness and I contaminated the things I touched.

To get better, I had to not only treat my body for infection, a backlog of nutritional deficiencies, etc, I had to sterilize my environment. This meant getting rid of stuff, owning less, etc until I could break the pattern of me infecting my stuff and my stuff reinfecting me and round and round we go.

My future should be better now that this old ID card is gone, though first I need to recover.